Board games can destroy relationships. They bring out the worst in people. My advice to young people is to play Taboo or Pictionary with your boyfriend or girlfriend as your partner before you get engaged. If you survive, your marriage has a good chance of success. If they call you an idiot because you can’t describe Bill Clinton with out using the words ‘horny’, ‘cheat’, ‘cheeseburger’, ‘Bubba’ or ‘President’ or ridicule you if you can’t draw a picture to describe ‘existentialism’, then you should reconsider your future together. And if you do get married, never play games against each other or on opposing teams. My wife plays online Scrabble against the computer and gets upset when she loses. I shudder to think of the consequences if she lost to me.
Board games can also interfere with your sleep. Never start a new game after dinner. Inevitably, one of the players will not let anyone quit until the game is over. Monopoly and Risk are particular killers. Just think about how long it took Napolean to conquer Europe or Trump to go bankrupt the first time before you start one of those games. Online board games are even worse. They can last for days. If you are in the midst of 12 different games of online Scrabble, don’t bring your iphone or ipad anywhere near your bedroom unless you want to be up all night thinking of three-letter words that end in ‘j’ (haj, raj, taj) or how to get rid of the ‘q’ when you don’t have a ‘u’ (qi, qis, qadi).
Board games can also destroy your self esteem. If you’ve ever played Charades and had to act out The Jungle Book, you will know how humiliating these games can be. And if you are over 50, you should forget about playing Trivial Pursuit. You will drive yourself crazy trying to remember things that you once knew. And most of what you once knew doesn’t even rise to the level of trivial anymore.