July 4th Playlist

As you get ready for your July 4th festivities, you might want to put together a special Independence Day soundtrack. Here’s mine:

  • All-American Girl, Carrie Underwood
  • America, Chita Rivera (West Side Story)
  • America, Simon & Garfunkel
  • American Baby, Dave Matthews Band
  • American Girls, Counting Crows
  • The Americans, John Mellencamp
  • Born in the U.S.A., Bruce Springsteen
  • Flags of Freedom, Neil Young
  • In America, Charlie Daniels Band
  • Independence Day, Carrie Underwood
  • My Hometown, Bruce Springsteen
  • On the Fourth of July, James Taylor
  • Our Country, John Mellencamp
  • Philadelphia Freedom, Elton John
  • R.O.C.K. in the U.S.A., John Mellencamp
  • Ragged Old Flag, Johnny Cash
  • Small Town, John Mellencamp
  • Song of the Patriot, Johnny Cash
  • Travelin’ Soldier, Dixie Chicks
  • Universal Soldier, Donovan
  • We’re An American Band, Grand Funk
  • 4th of July, Asbury Park, Bruce Springsteen
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Roommates

Do you remember when you first met your freshman roommate in college? That unique combination of excitment, anticipation and  trepidation that embodied the essence of moving away from home for good. I did it twice. My first roommate came from Nebraska looking like Grizzly Adams with a big head of bushy hair and a long straggly beard. It was alot of hair even for 1973.  He spent the first week of orientation trying to “find himself” both figuratively and literally. Each morning before setting forth to explore our brave new world, he would change his look by shaving some of his beard or cutting some of his hair, working his way through muttonchops, an Amish no-moustache look, tousled hair, a middle part, a pony tail, long-manicured sideburns to finally no beard at all. After that week of grooming experimentation, he chose to find himself a new roommate and moved to the other side of campus.

That was when I met my real roommate, the one who replaced him and stayed forever. He looked like the young Barry Manilow and brought a uniquely uncool music collection highlighted by The Raspberries (who amazingly produced seven remarkably similar greatest hits albums and did a three-year reunion tour beginning in 2004) and The Archies (Sugar Sugar). He also brought a year’s supply of Lysol aerosol cans, which he would spray on the floor before he walked on it with his large bare feet with creature-like toes (I quickly learned that he would also do my laundry if I left it on the floor long enough). He came to school as a scholar-athlete after being a heavily recruited football player (he will like that I said that). As a unique combination of running back and poetry major, he ran his pass routes in random loopity-loops reminiscent of his punctuation-free verse. Each day after he returned from football practice, we would watch Jeopardy together before dinner and I would crush him by quickly answering all the questions correctly. He became very intimidated by the intellectual challenge he confronted at an Ivy League college until he discovered after the football season that the same version of Jeopardy was on earlier each day.

We roomed together again senior year when we shared a house with some other guys and took turns cooking dinner. His cooking night was always an adventure. One night he came up with a unique recipe for beef quiche that involved placing raw beef in a pre-made pie crust, covering it with tons of swiss cheese and baking it on high heat for 40 minutes. Another night he made barbeque chicken by baking the chicken on a plastic tray covered with tin foil. We almost died.

I mention all of this today because it is one of our great family traditions to share July 4th weekend together with our families. We have remained best friends for almost 40 years and have known each other longer than we’ve known our wives and kids. We look forward to the shared continuity of watching our families grow and mature, punctuated each year by our July 4th weekend. And we all look forward to whatever wacky surprise my roomie comes up with. He never disappoints.

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Birthday Presents

Today is my wife’s birthday so it is impossible not to write about her. I got her a new custom-fitted road bike for her birthday present. She wasn’t very excited (which suggests she isn’t going to be thrilled with the forty-mile bike ride I’ve got planned for later today). Last year, I got her new golf clubs. She wasn’t very excited by those either. The prior year I got her a new set of dumbbells ranging from 2 to 30 lbs. She wasn’t amused then either, but she is now pumping the 15 pounders and her arms look great. The volleyball set, kayak, Yankee tickets and bike trip in Patagonia met with similar scorn in prior years. It’s hard to find the perfect gift when you only shop in sporting goods stores and stadium souvenir shops.

She gets her revenge on my birthday by buying me something practical like gloves or an umbrella. Since my birthday is in November and I always lose them, it seems like a good idea at the time. Sometimes she gets me new clothes. Generally, they are a new version of something that I already own and have taken years to work lovingly into perfect condition. The not-so-subliminal message is to watch my beloved old clothing very closely because it is destined for the thrift shop when I’m not looking.

As you might have guessed, I am not very good at receiving gifts. If I wanted something I would have already bought it, so whatever you give me is (by definition) something I don’t want or I already have. My family has attempted to outflank my predictable ungracious reaction by looking at my Amazon wishlist to search for possible gifts that I’ve already preselected. The problem with that strategy is that I don’t remember what’s on that list and never go back to edit it. So it includes some pretty obscure stuff.  For example, I just checked it and found President Nixon: Alone in the White House, all three volumes of Simon Schama’s History of Britain (see Buying Books), River Town: Two Years on the Yangtze (placed on there in 2007 before our trip to China), and An Empire of Wealth: The Epic History of American Economic Power (placed on the list in 2004 before we knew the truth). If I got any of that for my birthday, I’d be pretty upset, but it would be my own fault. So I’ve got some editing to do before November. I think I’ll add a 60-inch 3-D LED TV and a new Audi convertible and see if anyone gets the hint.

Happy Birthday Darling, I love you!

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Fort Knox

My daughter’s bank account is like Fort Knox. Impregnable. Money goes in. Nothing ever comes out. She has just completed her first year of full-time employment after graduating from college a year ago. During that year, we have been attempting to launch her on the road to financial independence. Accordingly, she has been largely responsible for her own expenses, subject to certain exceptions such as education, family-related travel and, of course, her expenses when she is home visiting her parents. She is very creative at exploiting these exceptions.

So, not surprisingly, we and other family members see alot of her. Most of her vacation time has been spent visiting her grandparents in Florida. Weekends are spent visiting her parents in the Hamptons or her aunt and uncle on Long Island. Prior to her arrival, we generally receive a shopping list of items she would like us to have ready for her visit. The requested quantities are invariably large enough to assure that she has a week’s worth of leftovers to bring back with her. Her dry cleaning tends to get left with ours and picked up a week later. We find ourselves a little lighter on soap, shampoo and toothpaste after one of her visits. She keeps close track of our whereabouts in between visits just in case we sneak off to Costco without her so she can text us her request list.

Her creative interpretation of rules is not new.  When she was very young, she was once punished and told she could not have dessert. She queried, “What about diabetic ice cream? Does that count?” When we went sightseeing, we had a rule that each of the kids could have only one souvenir at each stop. She would buzz about the gift shop furiously and come to the cash register with her hands filled with 8-10 items. I would remind her that she was only allowed one souvenir. She would identify one of the items and say, “That is my souvenir.” Then she would point at the remaining pile of pens, pencils, pads, erasers and books and declare, “The rest are school supplies!”

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More Golf Lessons

My wife and I were playing golf with another couple who we had just recently met. Both of the wives were beginners. The other husband paid close attention to his wife’s attempt to master the game, giving her tips and advice throughout the round. As she became increasingly frustrated, he reassured her, complimented her even when she just hit the ball a few feet, and continued to adjust her grip and stance on every shot. I avoided my wife and let the caddie handle the delicate task of instruction. At the end of the round, both wives were tired and frustrated. My wife took me aside and said “Did you see how attentive he was with his wife, trying to help her and giving her encouragement? You just ignored me completely! Why can’t you be more like him?” At the same time, the other wife took her husband aside and said “Did you see how patient Eddie was, allowing his wife to enjoy her day without constantly criticizing her and telling her what to do? You didn’t stop badgering me! Why can’t you be more like Eddie?”

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