No, say it ain’t so! America hates Cheryl Cole. She was slated to be one of the judges on Simon Cowell’s new X Factor USA and was apparently dumped because of her distinctive Geordie (Newcastle) accent. I am gutted. I’ve always been a sucker for small, dark and beautiful. So, since my wife won’t allow me to post any pictures of her, Cheryl is the next best thing. Here is a picture of Cheryl and me at a recent party at Madame Tussaud’s Wax Museum. (One of us is made of wax.)

Cheryl is a feisty young lady who grew up on council estates (public housing) in Newcastle-upon-Tyne as Cheryl Tweedy. She got her big break in late 2002 on the UK reality TV show Popstars: The Rivals, when she was selected to become one of the members of the all-girls band Girls Aloud, which went on to record 20 UK Top Ten hits including 4 Number One’s. Shortly after joining Girls Aloud, Cheryl was arrested and ultimately convicted for punching out a bathroom attendant in a nightclub. She later married England and Chelsea footballer Ashley Cole in 2006 and divorced him four years later, when he proved to be an incorrigible womanizer. She joined the UK version of X Factor as a judge in 2008, replacing Sharon Osborne, and became an instant fan favorite, successfully coaching the winning contestants for two consecutive years.

Now, Cheryl has apparently reached too far in taking on the USA. X Factor USA began taping auditions in March with Cheryl as a judge and is scheduled to premier on FOX in September. But apparently American audiences couldn’t understand her thick accent and never heard of her, so she will be left on the cutting room floor. America, ye hardly knew her. As we sing to our UK football refs: “You don’t know what you’re doing”.